The Simple Life: Self-kindness

Simple Self. A concept made up of how you treat yourself mentally and physically. Uncluttering the negative self language and useless avenues of energy.

As a mother and wife, I am responsible for more than just how my own self-image affects me but also how that perception affects my children and my husband. It should be no surprise that the way I feel about myself directly influences my interactions with the ones I love most. However, even though I know the direct correlation and the negative impact that it can have on my dearest ones my self-image is its own wild beast that can never really be domesticated but maybe at least tamed. Through simplifying the treatment of my self, I hope that my self-image follows suit.

How can I challenge this perception? How can I force myself to see the me that those I hold closest see? By taking care of my “self” as if I were my bestest friend.

As I have stated before, the Year of Simplicity is not about deprivation. What I am seeking is the exact opposite. In the case of my self, I’ve been depriving myself of things and activities out of what I thought I should be giving up as a mother and wife.  How foolish I have been, because in reality those things are what made me the individual I am, the woman my husband fell in love with, the friend my loved ones look to confide in. By suppressing those needs and organic avenues of self-love and appreciation I slowly was chipping away at the positive self-image I once had. In developing a negative self-image my interactions are weighted with this gray cloud. I unconsciously began to sacrifice the things enjoyed, to buy and give the excess of what my family already had.  Now those same exact items I sacrificed for are now the things I am getting rid of … the EXCESS toys, clothing, activities and people.

Keeping an eye on the bigger picture: I want to design a life where money worries are minimal, is full of special times with family and friends and my days are devoted to activities that I am passionate about and are important to me.  Thinking of the expenditures that gave me a lot of pleasure that were long-term, thinking of those that were quickly forgotten, using these terms to outline my self spending guide and to become a model of self-kindness.

I have my list and my model. As of January 1st I already started checking off the list. Letting myself enjoy what I deserve which in turn has led me to be a happier mommy and wife. I won’t bore you with the details, but I do hope you have set out to create yours as well. Treat yourself to that pedicure, that 20 minute shower, getting lost in a new best seller or wear that red lipstick, think of it as a business investment because as mommies and wives we are running the biggest business of all … families.

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