Patience is a virtue.

An asset that I do not possess today.

I thought I did when I woke up this morning but it appears that patience is a quality that I was not blessed with after a morning trip to open play, the library, the coffee shop and lunch at a restaurant with all three of my patience eating spawns.

I do not have patience for slow laptops.

I do not have tolerance for running out of creamer for my coffee.

I do not have patience for Mickey Mouse Clubhouse playing at 8 am.

I do not have tolerance for a four year old yelling at me that he wants Cheerios before I change his sister’s diaper.

I do not have patience for being a short order cook when the end result winds up in the dog’s mouth.

I do not have tolerance for a dishwasher that does not work.

I don’t have tolerance for arguments about which car seat each of my children want to sit in.

I do not have patience for buckling child seats with gloves on.

I do not have tolerance for 25 degree weather as I carry two toddlers, one at 25 lbs and the other at 31, across a parking lot, as I keep my eyes focused on the 38 lb four-year old in front of me.

I do not have patience for your little brat son purposely stepping on my little girl’s foot. BACK OFF you little punk.

I do not have patience for climbing up a small staircase in the middle of a plastic tree and sitting in a tunnel as I talk to my mother about what food to serve on Thanksgiving.

I do not have tolerance for changing a poopy diaper in the back of a mini-van in 30 degree weather.

I do not have patience for catching a train a block before our destination when my minions have obviously reached their breaking point.

I do not have tolerance for DVDs and books being ripped off the shelves while I pass out homemade cookies to show my thanks to the library staff for deal with my psycho children.

I do not have patience for automatic doors that say automatic but actually do not open and must be pushed open with all my might while I carry two toddlers, one at 25 lbs and the other at 31.

I do not have tolerance for you telling me that a cup of coffee costs almost three dollars and that’s a MEDIUM not even a large. Rip off.

I DO have patience for well behaved kiddos in a restaurant. Thank you baby Jesus.

I do not have tolerance for three small little ones wanting to play in the garage in 30 degree weather.

I do not have patience for fighting over one crayon when we have 5 million crayons on all three levels of this house.

I still do not have patience for Mickey Mouse Clubhouse playing on the television.

I do not have tolerance for stickers being stuck to the kitchen table rather than construction paper.

I DO have patience for naptime thirty minutes early, but I don’t have patience for making a snake out of a paper towel roll.

I do not have patience that it’s only 12:47 pm.